Respect Is to Be Grown

 

Recently, in one of the Toastmasters Table Topics Contests, a topic was “Respect is to be earned.” It is true but I prefer “Respect is to be grown”, which sounds more proactive and shows people the way to get respect from others.

We all want to be respected. To be respected is a human need. But this need can’t be produced on its own. We must make efforts to grow respect and take care of it, until one day we can achieve the result——to be respected.

When growing the crop, we must use our heart with care and attendance. Fruits cannot be got only by using advanced machines or techniques. It’s true as for respect. Use our heart to care about each and every person around us, make them feel important and appreciated, and try our best to help them.

There’s a man (let’s call him G) respected by almost everyone in our Toastmasters club. He is respected not because he was once the district governor, but because he shows care, appreciation and support to everyone he meets.

In a conference last year, I sat near G. After the meeting, a member he hadn’t met before came to him to say goodbye. He stood up, shook hands with him, and asked his name and something about his membership. That was out of my expectation. G was so approachable as a past district governor and I could tell the member felt cared and appreciated. Making everyone feel important gives G the credit to be respected.

You can always find G for guidance and advices as well, even though you may just get to know him. A friend of mine was determined to win the speech contest last year, so he decided to get suggestions from G. Although my friend had just been to G’s club twice, G invited my friend to his office and gave him a lot of guidance and advices.

When a speech is really boring, what are you doing? Every time as long as G is in a club meeting, no one will feel ignored even though the speaker’s speech is really boring. Once during the club meeting, after G went out for an important call, a speaker began his speech. I’m sorry to admit that his speech was really boring and he wasn’t articulate at all. Few of the audience looked at him and made response. The speaker himself began to feel boring and couldn’t wait to finish his speech. After a few seconds, G came back to the room. The speaker was saying that he finally made a decision to do something and went closer to his dream, G made a “wow” and “oh, yeah”. All the other audience began to pay attention to the speaker and responded, “Great!” The speaker’s eyes suddenly glittered and said, “yes, I made that decision!” He felt being encouraged and then filled with enthusiasm to continue his speech. Appreciation and support, G gives that to everyone.

There’s no wonder that everyone G meets come to say hello to him, and there’s no wonder when he shows up the crowd cheers the most. To be respected has nothing to do with the title, but the respect for others with our heart. Grow the respect, then you’ll receive the respect.

Commitment

What is commitment? You promise something and stand by it by all means. 

On the past Saturay, I did something crazy.

It was the last session, as well as the graduation ceremony, of the Prison Toastmasters Speechcraft last Saturday. I had promised the prison inmates to be there and sing a song for them as it would be the very last session.

I got up at 6am as usual and left home early, expecting to meet them for the precious last time. After one hour and ten minutes, I arrived at the subway station near the prison, and waited to transfer to a bus.

While I was waiting for the bus, I suddenly realized that I forgot to bring the temporary letter which will allow me to enter the prison! What a huge negligence! Without this letter, there’s no way for me to go into the prison. What’s worse, I live extremely far from the prison! It usually takes me one and half hours from my place to the prison! Thus, it would be like a disaster for me to fetch my temporary letter.

I immediately called our organizing member in the hope that he might have some ways. Unfortunately, it is impossible to get inside without the letter as it is very strict in the prison. He suggested that I could go around the shopping mall near the subway station and wait them for the get-together lunch if I was too tired to fetch the letter.

I couldn’t do that! There was only one thought in my mind at that moment, “I must go home and fetch it!” “It is the last session and I don’t want to let them down. What a loser I would be if I just walked around to kill the time!”

But, just think about the long journey! It made me sick! It would take me 3 hours to go back and come to the prison! Then the meeting would have almost finished by that time! Yes! Only taxi! It would be faster. I knew it would be a large cost and I would have nowhere to claim it.

I got on a taxi right away and headed back to my home! After one hour and ten minutes I was at the gate of the prison! It was happy to see them at the last session and bring them encouragement and happiness.

Some people may think I was insane and it was no big deal if I didn’t show up. Tell you what, I would have felt regretted if I couldn’t make it at the last session.

Are You Crazy Enough?

An excellent toastmaster did all the Advanced Projects 3 times! He’s a 3-time DTM.

When I heard this, I was astonished, “Is he crazy?”

Some people also wondered if it was because he had nothing else to do.

The truth is he really deserves the title of DTM. He grasped all the essence of each project, and he wrote guidance to each project which has been widely used among toastmasters here, let alone his help and support to many other toastmasters. He is the champion of District Evaluation Contest this November and the champion of District Speech Contest several years ago.

I was also told that how he struggled to improve his English as he was not born in an English-educating environment. Now he’s an English phonetic trainer.

We all have heard some stories about successful people. Sometimes, they seem too crazy to be understood.

What we may not have noticed behind their craziness are their determinations and persistence! They are so sticked to their dream that they’ll try each and every means to realize it.

Do you really desire to succeed? Stick to your dream and kick out “impossible” from your dictionary. Be crazy!

Special Toastmasters Clubs

Last Saturday I was invited as a judge for a contest. I didn’t know what it was like until I got there. It’s a club of disabled people.

I was shocked, either by the existence of such a club or the members’ spirit. Some of them sat in a wheelchair, some do not have a loud and clear voice, some cannot see you at the same view line as they have some problems with their eyes. But they all have a positive attitude, I guess, whether they aspire to improve themselves or to make friends.

I talked with one girl during the break, who was sitting in a wheelchair and couldn’t have a good eye contact with me. Then I knew it’s a new club and she has finished two projects. I was curious about what she does for a living.  I had guessed she must be working from home. Indeed, she told me she is a copywriter at home. Sometimes, I think they are more excellent, doing something that we may not have the ability to do. She didn’t know that I actually admired for what she does. I should have told her.

To tell the truth, it is not a good club. They don’t even know what the rules are. But so what? It’s a new club, and it needs more support. Fortunately, a lot of physically sound members lent their hands. Wish the club all the best.

Also, there’s another special club which I’m going to be a volunteer in Oct., Prisoner’s club. I do think everyone, as well as the prisoner, has the necessity to have a positive attitude and improve themselves. Will tell you more after my visit there.